Episode 26: Conan the Barbarian (1982)

Know, o princes and princesses, that in the time before Atlantis knew extreme humidity, two men strode the internet in search of movies that represented the spirit of the game Dungeons and Dragons.  Know too that in their quest, they encountered a mighty warrior whose accent was thicker than his muscles and who would one day wear the crown of California on a troubled brow.
Yes, this week we’re talking about the breakout film of the Governator, “Conan the Barbarian.” Give a listen and see if we consider Conan a true murder hobo.

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Episode 25: Eragon

Hail and well met, noble listeners whose deeds are glorious and whose thews are mighty.  Man, check out the thews on you guys.  Wow.  Welcome to our new series “In Search of Dungeons and Dragons”; Mike and I are life-long role-playing gamers and we got to thinking about which, if any, movies really capture the spirit of what it is to be an Adventurer, like the ones in the games.  A doer of daring deeds!  A buckler of swashes! In short: a murder hobo.  This week we’re facing the manksome foe “Eragon,” the 2006 fantasy movie adapted from the book of the same name.  There’s definitely a dragon in it, and one character gets locked in a dungeon so maybe . . . . Enjoy!

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Episode 24: Mary Poppins Returns

‘allo me old beauties, and a cheerful tinkery-tonk to one and all! We’ve got ourselves one last entry in our “In Theaters Now” series, and it’s “Mary Poppins Returns,” a sequel to the Disney classic based on the P.L. Travers book “Mary Poppins.”  Yes, we all asked for it and here it is, a mere 54 years after the original.  Hold off on flying that kite or investing that tuppence until after you’ve listed to our take on this bit of cinema.  Is it a spoonful of sugar or nothing but medicine? Listen and find out. For Queen and Country! Pip pip! Cheerio! Apples and pears! Bob’s your uncle!

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Episode 23: Aquaman

Once again we find our intrepid heroes grappling with another superhero movie in their series “In Theaters Now.” This week, can the dyspeptic duo marshal all their periodontic powers and converse about a possible cacaphonic celluloid calamity? Will they have to call their fishy friends? Will concentric circles expand out of their heads as they discuss “Aquaman,” the latest addition to the DC Cinematic Universe? Tune in to find out! Same fish time, same fish channel!

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Episode 22: Spider-Man: Into the Spider-verse

Hey there, true believers! This week’s “In Theaters Now” involves the animated film “Spider-Man: Into the Spider-verse,” the most recent attempt to translate Spider-man to the big screen.  Does it work? Does it fail? More importantly, if he’s got the powers of spider, why do his webs come out of his wrists? Shouldn’t they come out of a more . . . abdominal region? And if he “does whatever a spider can”, doesn’t that mean he should catch thieves, cocoon them in his web for a while, and then eat them? Wow, that would be a REALLY different movie . . . [Spoilers: at no time does Spider-man eat any of his criminal foes.  At least . . . not on screen . . . ].

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Episode 21: Robin Hood (2018)

Robin Hood, Robin Hood/Riding through the glen
Robin Hood, Robin Hood/With his band of men

Ah, the glorious story of Robin Hood, told so many times in literature, song, and film.  And here’s yet another interpretation, another in our series of “In Theaters Now” discussions.  Starring Taron Egerton, Jamie Foxx and a bunch of other unfortunates, I mean actors.  So does this one earn a place in the canon? Will it make us forget such classics portrayals as those of Errol Flynn, Patrick Bergen, Bugs Bunny, and Daffy Duck? Give a listen and find out!

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Brief Respite

Hallo there, my little droogies! While we didn’t take a break for Thanksgiving, we are taking one this week.  Just for this episode, promise! We’ll be back next week with meanderings, musings, and . . . um, marmosets.  Yes, in our next series we’ll be focusing exclusively on the sprawling sub-genre of films that prominently feature marmosets.  That’s what we’ll be doing.  I’m totally not completely lying about this and I’m certainly not going to pretend next week that I never said this.  Cough.
Please do join us next week!

Episode 20: Ralph Breaks the Internet

Happy Thanksgiving weekend to all our stunning and well-groomed listeners! Continuing in our “In Theaters Now” we have the animated film “Ralph Breaks the Internet,” the sequel to 2012’s “Wreck-It Ralph.” Join us as we ask the question on everyone’s mind: why isn’t Dirk the Daring from Dragon’s Lair in this movie? Serious oversight.  Ralph, Vanellope, Felix, and Calhoun are all back.  Plus internet references! So . . . many . . . internet references. Enjoy!

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Episode 19: Fantastic Beasts: The Crimes of Grindelwald

‘morning, my merry muggles! Another in our series “In Theaters Now”! And what’s in theaters now? Why the latest in the Potterverse movies “Fanfictional Beasts: The Crimes of the Bandersnatch.”
Yeah, I’m pretty sure that’s the title.  Once again we follow the adventures of Newt Scamander (yeah, his brother’s name is “Theseus” and this poor schlub is stuck with “Newt.”  Nice one, Mr. and Mrs. Scamander) as he dives into an immensely complicated plot endeavoring to squeeze a little more magic out of this franchise.  Does he succeed? Not even the Cruciatus Curse could force me to reveal it! But listening to this episode just might.
Enjoyio Podcastio! (. . . . I’m so sorry)

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Episode 18: The Grinch (2018)

Here we are with another in our series “In Theaters Now,” where we discuss a movie that just opened this weekend.  This week, just in time for . . . two weeks before Thanksgiving . . . it’s the newest update/reboot/reimagining/cashgrab of Dr. Seuss’ classic Christmas tale “How the Grinch Stole Christmas”, an animated creation with the voices of Benedict Cumberbatch, Rashida Jones and a brief voice cameo by Angela Lansbury.  Is it any good? How does it stack up against the original 1966 animated classic? Give a listen and find out.  Hear us be holly and jolly and other words ending in “-olly”!

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