Episode 219 – The Maltese Falcon (1941)

The rain was pounding down hard on the City of Beans, the kind of rain that can almost scrub the filth off the streets . . . but not quite. My partner and I were sitting in our office, staring at our agency name backwards on the glass door: sevitceteD; ekiM, xaM when suddenly . . . SHE clopped in. Another damn pony. Ponies are nothing but trouble; we both remembered our deceased third partner, Bumpy O’Toole, gone to that great glue factory in the sky. This one was definitely trouble; fancy bridle with silver chasings, the best high-heeled horseshoes . . . but you could still sense that there was blood on those hooves . . .

Yes, in this week’s episode of our “Monochrome” series, we’re walking the dark, sullen streets of one of the classics of Film Noir, “The Maltese Falcon.” All the usual suspects are here: Bogey, Peter Lorre, Sidney Greenstreet, Mary Astor, and they’re all looking for . . . wait, I know this . . . some sort of statue . . . of a . . . chicken? Yeah, I’m pretty sure it’s a chicken statue. From . . . I want to say, Cleveland? Well, tune in and find out the fate of the Cleveland Chicken . . . that doesn’t sound right . . . The Des Moines Duck? The Albanian Albatross? Tune in, it’ll come to me.

Poll question: Who is your favorite cinematic detective?

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5 thoughts on “Episode 219 – The Maltese Falcon (1941)”

  1. My favourite detective is always Sherlock Holmes, while I don’t really think the Basil Rathbone films hold up I loved them as a kid and I think the Robert Downey films are fun and used aspects of the character earlier versions ignored while keeping it entertaining. I love orson Welles in tough of evil (a black and white classic, hint hint) even though he is basically a terrible detective that plants evidence against people he seems to feel are guilty because of their race.

    1. I always loved Basil Rathbone, too and would watch his Holmes films whenever they came on TV38. I liked the ones in Victorian times better than those taking place in the 30s and 40s. “Touch of Evil,” you say. Well, we just MIGHT be doing that film in this series. Might. 😀 Thanks, Vince!

  2. DEX DOGTECTIVE from FOODFIGHT! is a classic.

    (He is not. Please don’t watch that movie. Or do, it’s your podcast.)

    My actual vote would be for Hercule Poirot, with Albert Finney and Kenneth Branagh tied for my favorite (movie) portrayals. If you’re willing to stretch your definition of a detective to include more action-oriented titles, Rick Deckard would be in the running as well. Come to think of it, Blade Runner is almost an honorary black-and-white movie.

    Seriously, if you wanted to make a series on “Movies for children that absolutely should not be watched by children you care about,” I think Foodfight! may top the list. It’s a time. I notice that you haven’t done a 200th episode special just yet…

    1. Ye gods, “Foodfight”? I’ve actually heard of this travesty; I’m sorry to hear you actually watched it. But you bring up a really interesting idea for a series, which I am totally taking credit for . . . oh . . . I probably shouldn’t have written that down. DANGIT! Seriously, thanks, and cool answers! And thanks for the idea for a series.
      What do you mean, we haven’t done a 200th episode yet?! Didn’t you see our 200th episode bat-stravaganza? Our four-part, that’s right, FOUR-PART, episode on Batman! It’s under the “Specials” category, if you’ve got a really long car ride coming up.

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